I have not discovered the Undisclosed Location Cheney Bunker that contains all the A-list celebrities, so my brushes with greatness are not exactly People magazine cover material. You know who topped the celebrity sighting list on Monday? No, you know who was my celebrity sighting for Monday? Edward freakin' Hermann. That's the voice of Dodge automobiles and dozens of books-on-tape, veteran of numerous "Oh, it's that guy" character roles, and Goldie Hawn's husband in "Overboard". Somewhere around town there was a charity hockey game with all the cool people, and I get to spot the Senior Vampire from the "Lost Boys". I want shiny celebrity! I'm an American!
All interesting things I may have overheard were ploughed over, scorched, and salted by the incredibly vapid conversation held next to me by cell phone girl ("Do you want to see, like, a cool sweater?") and her fabulous ("You know I love a cool sweater.") boy friend. Apparently, like her friend Erica is, like, totally on probation, like as her friend, but she doesn't know yet. In the short version, Erica tries to date cell phone girl's friends. In the longer version, there are about 459 "likes" and three text messages. There is a total ignorance of the speaker to the fact that her only chance with any male is the confluence of heavy drinking and a shot at the "Pig of the Week" trophy. Worse, drama club boy friend ran into Kristen Wiig in town. Unbelievable.
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